Today, Friday October 6th, 2017 has been exactly a week since my support system fell apart. At around 6pm on Friday Sept. 29th, 2017 I got the worse call of my life, telling me my ground had just received an earthquake and my angel has been taken from this world.
I know this is a parrots blog but it’s also a very important part of my life. So I’m turning to you after a week of being depressed to apologize for my absence but to also share my grief with you. The worse feeling a person can have is to not know if maybe I could have changed the outcome of that day… What if I had called him? What if I wasn’t so self-consumed with my own life that I had taken the time out to spend more time with him? What if, what if , what if… I will never know because this is one time, we don’t have the opportunity to have a 2nd chance.
Friday Sept 29th, 2017 Brandon Briggs a 32 year old man who was a father of 4 kids all under the age of 8, a brother, an uncle and most important to me – an angel, collided with a wood chipper at around 11:40 am. He died at the scene. I appreciate the bystanders who carried him from the driver’s seat to the back seat of the car to try and help, thank you for caring. The police called for an air ambulance to get him but unfortunately he Died before he could be transported to the hospital. The last day I ever spoke to him and heard his voice, received a text was Tuesday, September, 23rd, 2017 and I wasn’t very interactive at the time as I was consumed with other things. It sucks because I was off and we were suppose to spend that time together and other things came up cutting our time short in more ways than one. We still have yet to hear back from the autopsy, receive his belongings from the police or lay him down to rest.
I always said he had my back even through our times of arguing…. We were born the same month, same year and only a day apart. I had my first son 2 years before he had his first daughter but my son was born on the same day of the month and his daughter was also born on the same day as the month. My son is 08/08 and his daughter came exactly 2 years and 2 months and 2 days later at 10/10. I don’t know if there is some kind of connection there but I think there is. He went on to have 3 more kids with the last one being only 1 years old. He had Egypt who was 8 at the time, Cairo, a boy who is 7, Pharoah, a boy who is 4 and just started school this year and Nile a 1 yr old girl. I also followed him having 3 more kids of my own. B, I guess you were right, we are stopping at 4. You will never meet my last one and it hurts to know it will never know what a fabulous uncle it had but I’ll tell the kids and show them pictures and videos – I won’t let you be forgotten, I promise.
Anyways he had a beautiful family who now has to be raised by only their mother.
They opened a gofundme account and are now after a week at 24k, way more than they asked for. I’m overwhelmed with the amount of love and support that has went out to help them but this just shows you how many people loved and cared for him. How many lives he touched. He was a great man and I never told him how much I loved him and appreciated him or at least I don’t remember telling him anytime recently.
Did he know that I loved him? Did he know that I still considered him my backbone, my support system? I will never love another person as much as I loved my dear uncle Brandon. Our bond went beyond words but yet I feel like I neglected him on so many occasions. I wasn’t at every birthday party he held for the kids even though I tried to mostly be there. I still missed one or two and now I regret it. I wish I drove to visit him more often. Yes, we spoke for hours on ends but it doesn’t feel like it was enough now. I used to always tell him “B, this is my #brokelife.” and he would laugh and say “You kill me with that.” When we were both down, we would talk and he would ask me, “How do you do it? You’re so strong.” He would constantly tell me that and I would say, ” To be honest, I have no idea but you got to do what you have to do, just pray.”
At the age of 32 I was/am struggling to find my calling but he had just found his, maybe 2 years ago… Can’t remember but a few years ago he started tattooing and he was good at it. I got a tattoo on my foot done from him and I was suppose to go back for him to outline it and now I will never have the chance. He stopped tattooing for a while and then he found his painting. What an amazing gift! He found his calling! He was an artist and tonight exactly a week after his passing was his show where he was suppose to put on a meet-the-artist reception and showcase his work. His work will still be showcased but unfortunately he won’t be there. On facebook, I said I want to meet the artist! So I’ll be there! and he responded back saying, “you can get an autograph too”.
Will I B? Could I? I would give my life for an autograph now…. How could I have not treasured our time together more? I thought we were going to grow old together…. Instead I’m here by myself and I’m not doing so well… I need you!
He was my biggest supporter, telling me how good I write. Even though he wasn’t a pet fan, he supported my passion for parrots regardless. I was suppose to write an artist grant request for him and I kept pushing it off and he told me, “OMG your never going to do it, I’m going to get my bro to do it.” I told him I am going to do it but get your brother to do one anyways and then we can see which one is better… Now I will never be able to do him that favor…
He never asked me for things, but I was always asking him for his ear, for his attention, for his time and he never once made me feel like I was bothering him. He was my twin, my life, my best friend, my confidant. Everything I could have ever asked for in an uncle… Our time was cut short and I never got to return the support or at least I don’t feel like it. At this point, I feel like I was a selfish partner in this and not an equal companion and I wish I could change that but I should have changed it years ago…
Let me end this rant by saying this… We hear all the time, don’t take life for granted. Let the people you love know that you love and appreciate them. Always find time for those who find time for you. Enjoy your moments with one another and cherish it. All of these sayings sound so cliche but let me tell you: I’m kicking myself now that I didn’t listen to those little tidbits, it would probably have made a huge difference in my grieving process.
We were and always will be “The twins”. Nothing will change that. I’m sorry I wasn’t right beside you in that car on Friday. Maybe I could have made a difference or at least we would have died together. Born a few hours apart making us come into this world on the 21st and the 22nd of March. I thought we would die close together also…. But I’m not God and I don’t know what the future holds for me anymore now that you are gone hopefully whatever it is I can make you proud because I’m trying to live for both of us now… That’s a hard task man! lol. I just want you to know if I never told you even though I’m sure I did but I love you B, you are my heart and Soul and I was extremely proud of you! Possibly even a bit jealous because you found your calling before I was able to find and establish mine but no worries I’m right behind you as always. Even though I’m the older one, so I should be ahead hahaha.
Always comforted me! I have to end this as the tears won’t stop so I can’t even see what I am writing anymore. I will be pushing my children’s story to get publish this year, well next year when they accept applications again and I figure I will try to write a few on you… Wish me luck hopefully you will be here to guide me and give me the push that you had to just come out of no where and blow up in your talent.
To my subscribers/followers, I’m sorry for this sad post but I had to connect my two worlds. I hope to get back to my Youtube videos and blogging as soon as possible. If you haven’t subscribed please do so, on Youtube and Instagram we are “Parenting Parrots”. Tonight I will be going to his showcase, if you live in Toronto, Canada and can make it, please do! I know this is last minute but this meant the world to him. His first show I went to, was in a club and stupid me didn’t know and didn’t walk with ID so I missed it although I was there…. So can’t make that happen again this time. I haven’t re-read this so if there is spelling mistakes or grammer errors, I apologize.
Come and support my Uncle’s talent that will no longer be able to be produced. We will be at the Freedom Factory at 22 Dovercourt from 7pm to 11pm tonight, October 6th, 2017. Look at the flyer below for all the information.
Thank you for your support! Please let’s get this blog out there so I can make my uncle proud!!!
R.I.P Brandon Briggs March 22nd, 1985 – September 29th, 2017
You can check out his art work at http://hollywoodbriggs.bigcartel.com/